Picking at a scab that's not ready

This is possibly the best way to describe how I feel right now. Writing thank you cards can be a tedious process. I always feel awkward, how I am in real life just extends to the written word. Don't get me wrong, I have a lot to be thankful for--especially such wonderful family and friends; and for all of their prayers, love, and support after my father passed away. But writing all of these cards, and reliving that horrible night and rehashing EVERYTHING is just draining and painful. And I hate my handwriting.