Oy. What a crummy weekend. One of The Bear's friends is going through a really hard time. My heart goes out to him. The Bear's guy friends are a different breed...they call each other all the time, they get mad if someone doesn't invite them to do something or if they forget each other's birthdays. They might as well have ovaries. They are a very sweet and loyal bunch, though. Truly great guys.
Anyways, the guys had been out all evening and wound up at a corner bar right around the corner from our house. I thought I could use a night cap and decided to crash. The minute I walk in, my husband announces that one of my good friends (who is married to one of his good friends) is pregnant. And it happened on her first cycle off birth control. Ouch.
I feel awful. I want to be so happy for them and their new little one. I want to sit and talk with her about how she is feeling and how excited she is. But I don't think I will be able to do that without totally losing my shit. I haven't told her that The Bear and I have been trying for six months and how I've been having problems. That I wake up every morning and pee on a stick to see if I'm ovulating and that if I maybe ovulate then I have a 1 in 4 chance of getting pregnant. That if I don't get my stupid period, I'll have to induce it with medication and will have to start Clomid and that maybe it will work. And if all of THAT works there is always the increased chance of miscarriage that comes along with PCOS.
How do you balance that? How do you balance being happy for your friends but so sad for yourself?
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Oh, my dear friend. This is a tough one. I think your reaction is totally normal and understandable. Let's talk later today. In the meantime - I love Scrambled Eggs! Just the right amount of wit and grit. (Grit!Even that's a breakfast term!) Hmmmm...now I want bacon. Love you!
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